mollyringle | Entries tagged with self

Tagged by

new_iconoclast...

1) Players start with 8 random facts about themselves.
2) Those who are tagged should post these rules and their 8 random facts.
3) Players should tag 8 other people and notify them they have been tagged.

So, my 8 random facts:

1. As proof that I'm behind the times, I have never sent or received a text message on a cell phone.

2. As further proof of the same thing, up until about a year ago I thought "MySpace" was a file storage type of site. Which I guess it is, if you count skanky photos and long emo posts as files.

3. After reading about noctilucent clouds on SpaceWeather.com, and seeing photos of them, I thought, "Oh, sure, I've seen those plenty of times." I verified this the other night by looking out the window at twilight and spotting some. Sure, there they are; we get 'em all the time here, I figured. Then I found out I was just lucky, for these are fairly rare at this latitude. So what was I seeing before? Not-so-lucent clouds, evidently.

4. I think I have a bunion on one foot. I'm not sure what to do about that, but my mother-in-law has them and they've nearly crippled her on bad days. Greeeat.

5. I tend to like fantasy but not sci-fi; love stories but not romance novels; true crime but not mysteries. With exceptions for each, of course.

6. I like purple flowers best of all. Then blue. Then white. Then red or yellow. But fragrance is really more important than color.

7. I eat peanut butter with chocolate chips off a spoon (or a table knife) quite a lot. I maintain that this is a healthy snack.

8. I disapprove of most bumper stickers. They're a bad policy. Sooner or later, everyone, even you, does something annoying in traffic. At that point, those who agree with your bumper sticker will be dismayed because you're making their side look bad; and those who disagree with your bumper sticker will just hate you even more for it.

And now...I disobey the rules by not tagging anyone, but inviting anyone to take part who wants to. I have a cold; I get to bow out early.

Just in case you ever wondered, it costs $45 for a locksmith to come let you back into your house when you've locked yourself out. Or maybe I was robbed blind and it really should cost less. I don't know. I've honestly never done it until today. Go me!

Yes, we do indeed need to start keeping a spare key somewhere outside the house. Like maybe under the mat or under a flowerpot next to the door, because no one would ever think of looking there.

Grumble. So, now, a meme from

modmerseygirl.

1. YOUR NAME: Molly
2. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?: My middle name is the same as my mom's best friend's name. "Molly" just sounded nice and American, which my folks wanted after six months in France.
3. WHEN DID YOU LAST CRY?: Hmm...really cry? Hard to recall. Tears in the eyes? The Buffy episode "The Body," watched a few days ago. Yes, I'm a sappy fan sometimes. But that was a *sad* episode--anyone who has seen it can back me up.
4. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?: Not my cursive. My non-cursive, which I use far more often, is OK.
5. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT?: Chicken. Or maybe roast beef.
6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?: Sure, if I ever met me, which would be hard because I don't get out much.
7. DO YOU HAVE A JOURNAL?: Far too many.
8. DO YOU USE SARCASM A LOT?: Definitely! (That was

modmerseygirl's answer, which amuses me because she's so ridiculously sweet, and I associate sarcasm with harsher people, like me.)
9. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS?: Yep.
10. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP?: Probably not, though oddly I think I could skydive.
11. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL?: Cheerios.
12. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF?: Not lately.
13. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG?: I think I'm stronger than I think I am. If that makes any sense.
14. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM?: Any kind with chocolate cookie or brownie pieces in it.
15. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE?: Probably hair; it's easier to assess from a distance.
16. RED OR PINK?: Red! I actually eschew pink.
17. WHAT IS THE LEAST FAVORITE THING YOU LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF?: What a very odd question. Uh...my eyes...?
18. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST?: I suppose grandparents, and not just mine.
19. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO SEND THIS BACK TO YOU?: No; they should post it on their own journals. ;)
20. WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES YOU ARE WEARING?: Faded blue jeans; no shoes.
21. THE LAST THING YOU ATE?: Cookie dough, molasses/chocolate.
22. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW?: The cold wind outside and my own typing.
23. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE?: Pine green.
24. FAVORITE SMELL: Rain in a warm season.
25. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE?: The locksmith.
26. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU?: Very much. :)
27. FAVORITE DRINK?: Water, or English/Scottish/Irish Breakfast Tea with milk and sugar.
28. FAVORITE SPORT TO WATCH?: I don't, really. I zone out within seconds.
29. HAIR COLOR?: Blondish reddish brown.
30. EYE COLOR?: Greenish brown (hazel)
31. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS?: Nope.
32. FAVORITE FOOD?: There's never just one food I could eat forever. But chocolate is an obvious contender. Cheese is up there too.
33. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDING?: I prefer a happy ending, but a really great story would have it all.
34. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED?: 'Free Enterprise,' via Netflix
35. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING?: Brown
36. SUMMER OR WINTER?: I prefer fall and spring...but winter is less hateful to me than summer. If it's too hot to wear jeans, then I find it too hot.
37. HUGS OR KISSES?: Well, who we talking about caressin' here, sweet thang?
38. FAVORITE DESSERT?: Something with dark chocolate integrally involved in it
39. MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND?: Whoever wins the "most bored today" award.
40. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING?: 'Three Junes' by Julia Glass. I can't quite decide if I like it or not.
41. WHAT'S ON YOUR MOUSE PAD?: Grayness.
42. WHAT DID YOU WATCH LAST ON TV?: Probably a Buffy episode.
43. FAVORITE SOUNDS?: The soothing voices of familiar radio personalities
44. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES?: Definitely Beatles, though I like a few Stones songs pretty well.
45. FURTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME?: If I calculate correctly...Inverness, Scotland
46. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT?: I can actually finish writing novels instead of just saying I would like to write one someday. Sorry. Make that: "Snarkiness at all the wrong moments."
47. LEAST LIKELY TO SEND THIS BACK?: N/a
48. WHERE WERE YOU BORN?: Oregon
49. NEW YEARS RESOLUTION?: To be a more considerate driver, and try to view other drivers as human beings and not demons.

Quotes from conversation lately, recorded mostly for my own amusement...

MOLLY: I'd rather go to Disneyland than Vegas.

STEVE: There's a race to the bottom.

MOLLY: At least Disneyland's motives are purer.

STEVE: Are they, really?

MOLLY: Okay, then at least there's less prostitution in Disneyland.

BOTH: (after a pause) Is there, really?

---

STEVE takes off wedding ring in preparation for washing dishes, and makes dramatic point of putting it down on counter, as if renouncing entire marriage.

STEVE: I've had it with this crap. I ain't your baby-daddy, and I'm going on Maury Povich to prove it!

Current Mood: amused

I am 31 today. Sweet, another prime number. I've been missing that since 29.

A couple years ago I had you all make virtual gifts for me from stuff you found online. Let's do that again. Find a picture of something on the internet you're giving to me. For instance, the Taj Mahal. Post it in the comments for everyone to admire.

Whoever called up the cloudy, almost foggy, weather with the 57-degree temperature: THANK you!

Posted here because I said I would on the Ringwraith journal...

[Poll #758886]

No, it's not an automotive rebate program. It is, according to those who dabble in astrology, what I'm going through right now:

Astrologers call the period between ages twenty-eight and thirty "Saturn Return." That's because it's the first time the planet Saturn completes its cycle through your birth chart and returns to the spot it occupied when you were born. ... While undergoing your Saturn Return you may find yourself turning inward ... You may feel lonely and alienated from those around you, while family and friends think you are shutting them out. ...Even if your external world seems to be in order, your internal structure may feel as though it's being assaulted with a battering ram. Nervous conditions, irritability, depression, insomnia, and feelings of insecurity are common.

Considering this is astrology - which is, to say the least, a complete crock - the assessment of the 28-30 age range is dead-on. I don't believe it has one damned thing to do with the planet Saturn, but "Saturn Return" is an attractive name for it, so I shall call it that. ("Dude, this is my band, Saturn Return.")

Apologies to everyone who has experienced my excessive weirdness recently. I hate to tell you it isn't over yet. But I'm doing my best to get that planet spinning away from me once again, and someday I hope to be able to approach you with serenity, generosity, and good humor. In the meantime, I must remember the cardinal rule of LJ:

"If you don't have anything nice to say... don't enable comments."
;)

Current Music: Hotel Lights, "The Mumbling Years" (on Radio io)

(Isn't that what LJ is all about, really?)

I've been reading a book about sleep lately, and it has verified what I already suspected: I should try to get more of it, and the health consequences of not getting enough are hugely serious, not just a mild inconvenience. Mood is the first thing to plummet when you don't have enough sleep. Reaction time and sharpness of thinking suffer too—basically, you get stupid when you're sleep-deprived. And your immune system takes a grievous hit as well, opening you up to all kinds of problems.

But let's just look at mood for now.

I found myself wondering this morning, as I stumbled around getting ready for work when I wasn't quite awake, "Does everything seem so stressful in my daily life lately because I'm not getting enough sleep? Or am I not getting enough sleep because everything is so stressful?" The book hasn't said yet whether we actually need more sleep when we have stressful situations going on, but it has said that we feel stress a lot more acutely when we're sleep-deprived. So, I suppose it follows that more sleep would ease stress.

Or maybe it's all in my head. I'm a firm believer in the notion that the brain can screw you up any which way. Question is, how much can you actually do about it, even if you know it's just in your head?

I've wondered a similar thing before, years ago, when lying in bed with an upset stomach: "Does the world seem so nightmarish because I'm sick? Or am I sick because the world is so nightmarish?" Some days, probably just the former. Other days, it's got to be the latter. Most of the time, though, it's hard to tell.

Lately, with the changes at work, my stress has led me into my usual dichotomy: low self-esteem and the certainty that I suck on the one hand, countered by narcissism and the belief that everyone is being unfair to me on the other. Which is truer? How can I tell in any given situation?

Recently, I've decided most of what I write is stupid, my intelligence is severely overrated, my attempts at humor are pathetic, and my social skills are appalling. I've also decided I'm doing exactly what I'm supposed to do, am being unjustly condescended to, and am perfectly normal in being quiet and introspective to the point of isolation. No, I don't think I'm bipolar. I just think I'm full of conflicts and am always questioning whether my actions are "right". Perhaps I over-question and simply need to relax.

I have no point to this, except to hope it explains my personality a little better to those who don't quite get me. Several times in my life I've been told I'm mysterious. I'm not trying to be; I'm just not sure what I think of myself, so I'm standing over here quietly musing over the subject, when I probably should be doing something productive.

Maybe the constant conflict is good for me, as a writer. No story without conflict, right? Then, hey, I'm your gal!

But I know there are two things I must keep at the top of my list of priorities: one is sleep. The other is humor. It's life-threatening to skimp on the former, and a cardinal sin (in my book) to skimp on the latter. That goes for all the rest of you, too.

No, make that three things. Chocolate. Yes.

I am inspired, by

jedmiller's mention of theatre involvement last week, and by

impetuousnote's mention of tedious ex-boyfriends, to reminisce today about an incredibly dumb incident in my youth.

But first, the opening act: found by

pegkerr: Remarkably well-done filk on "I Am the Very Model of a Modern Major General", from Aragorn's point of view. Some favorite couplets:
I'm Estel and I'm Aragorn, and Elessar and Strider, too
I've hunted orcs and trolls and wargs, and sometimes a Black Rider, too.
My sword is old and busted but I wield it with impunity
And draw it out and flourish it at every opportunity.
Hee hee. OK, anyway...

When I was fifteen, my boyfriend (who will we fictionally continue to call Aaron) convinced me to try out for the school play with him. The play was called Blue Denim and was a sentimental drama set in the '50s about a teenage girl who falls in love, gets pregnant, and gets an abortion. Aaron thought it would be pretty rad if he got the part of the boy and I got the part of the girl. I, for one, thought it would be weird and unpleasant, and would have preferred getting the chance to kiss some other guy on stage instead, but I kept that thought to myself.

Well, to everyone's total shock, I got the part of the girl. ( And the drama ensues. )

Current Music: "Sadness," David Garza

Thanks, all, for the civilized discussion. I still wish I hadn't even brought up the topic, since I don't enjoy debates, but there hasn't been any actual flaming yet, and that's about as much as I could hope for.

It also made it clear that I have a broad spectrum of types reading this journal, so here's a little poll on demographics that I've been meaning to do for a while anyway. Check all that apply, and I'll start putting up banner ads accordingly to match my target audience. (Kidding.)

[Poll #166795]

Current Music: Rain. Mmmm.

Promptly stolen from

pipu.

( Really fascinating stuff about me. )

Current Music: Small Faces: "Itchycoo Park"

("We don't know, Mol, but we bet it's difficult to spell.")

It's just wrong to need the air conditioning at 10 p.m. Of course, in one week I'll be in the cool and damp of Seattle; and then on the 4th of July I'll be at the Puget Sound beach house where it almost always rains for Independence Day. Most people are used to tanktops and sunscreen and hotdogs for the 4th. I'm used to raingear, and firecrackers dying in the drizzle. It's charming, in its way. In any case it's better than needing the air conditioning at 10 p.m.

During our visit north for the house-hunt, I was a stress case, and to make matters worse I hadn't exercised much in a week or so, due to having had a cold. Getting no exercise makes the stress effects hugely more noticeable. I had barely any appetite. Seeing people I liked made me more stressed, because, well, I want them to like me and I want to seem cool. It's an incredibly dumb cycle of heavy-duty introvertive angst that I sometimes get into, and seldom know how to get out of. In this case, finding a place to live relieved the stress, and then returning here and getting some serious exercise (bike-riding around town) helped a great deal too. I am now eating like an elephant, despite the heat. Thank goodness. Unwilling anorexia is really not my preferred lifestyle, but under certain stressful times I swear my stomach actually shrinks. I just *cannot* eat more than a tiny bit at a time.

Seriously, what the hell is going on when that happens? Any medical types among you have any idea? Because I hate it and want to outgrow it, not grow further into it. I've looked up anxiety disorder and so forth on the web, and I'm pretty sure I don't have that - I'm not as miserable as those folks describe themselves. But I'm such an introvert, and make such a big deal to myself about seeing people, especially people I like, or going places (especially fun places), that I make supposedly fun situations no fun at all for myself. It is so, so stupid. I can see how stupid it is. Yet it happens anyway.

But, here I am, eating cookies and drinking port, so that explains why I'm rambling. Er, I mean it proves that I can get past it after a few days. Or something. Let's just move on.

Happy Gothly things:

When you do a Google search on "Edinburgh ghost legends", even without the quotation marks, you get my webpage about Tourist Attractions first, and the publisher's webpage 6th. This is a small thing, but it pleases me. And a search on "Edinburgh ghost stories" turns it up 8th.

Tolkien Online has a picture of the location where they're filming the entrance to the Paths of the Dead. Thanks to

wee_tolkien for reporting that. Looks very spooky and cool. New Zealand was a heck of a good choice for Middle-earth - they seem to have all the requisite landscapes. (OK, so Lothlorien was mostly a sound-set. This doesn't disprove anything.)

I almost never talk about stories I'm in the process of writing, mostly because I figure you couldn't care less, but I'll just mention for kicks that I'm actually giving up on a story that I've been slaving away on for the past couple years. It's been ages since I've given up on a novel after putting so much effort into it. But it isn't clicking for me, and it just shouldn't be this hard. I think I'll abandon it, come back to it some other year maybe, and in the meantime write some fun outlandish ghost story, since obviously my mind is wandering in such places lately. A big house with a tragic accident in its past and a poltergeist in its present, and a cute guy who might hold the secrets to what's going on - yeah, I think that's the kind of thing I can write. Heh. I know. I'm sad.

Enough already! Goodnight.

Current Mood: mm. food.
Current Music: "Midnight, the Stars, and You"

(Or was it '91?...Little of both, I guess.)

Because I'm procrastinating from finishing my term projects, I looked through my old writings and found this little piece ("gem" really seems an overstatement). Though it is written as a short story, and the boys' names have been changed, it is in fact completely true. It was once the great romantic regret of my life. Now it's just funny. Now that I am a well-behaved Ancient Person, I hope it can reassure, guide, or entertain today's teenagers.

P.S. I cringe at some of the sappiness now. But you should've seen my actual teenage writings. Sugar overdose; diabetics beware!

( You can skip this unless you feel like reading teen-angsty romance memories )

Current Mood: Nostalgic but amused
Current Music: "Folk Song," Ash

(I know. That's not really French.)

Ways in which I am more like a stereotypical male:

1. I forget birthdays, anniversaries, and Hallmark-holidays constantly, and I don't expect much to happen on them.

2. I play trash-can basketball with crumpled-up Kleenex, paper towels, etc.

3. Some lustful thought or salacious innuendo flits across my mind roughly every 17 seconds.

4. I can do push-ups. (25 in a row.)

5. I roll my eyes and/or make cat-with-hairball noises if faced with unforgivably sappy lines in movies.

6. With very few exceptions, I will not wear pink, nor things with heart shapes on them.

7. I pretty much never paint my fingernails.

8. I'm not very good at sewing, knitting, or home decorating, and don't have much interest in learning them.

9. I hate wearing high heels or other "cute" shoes that cut and mangle my feet and have no traction.

10. I dabbled in skateboarding as a child.

11. I hated most of the wedding preparations. Faffing about with ribbons, flower arrangements, white shoes, something borrowed, something blue, and something to strangle myself with, seemed kind of a waste of time.

On the other hand: ways in which I am, indeed, a stereotypical female:

1. I did enjoy wearing the wedding dress and the fancy accoutrements. In fact, in all honesty, I would also enjoy having an occasion that gave me an excuse to wear a tiara.

2. I am addicted to chocolate.

3. I own and use an impressive array of cosmetics and hair-care products.

4. "Orlando! Elijah! Ewan! Jude! *squeee* They're so cute!" (Yeah, I even make myself sick sometimes. But, in my defense, I ask you to look at Orlando in this post of

kateelvellon's. I mean, for the love of everything holy, how could anyone possibly think his froo-froo-Legolas-blond look was better than that? Granted, I kind of wish he'd shave. Oh, and pay no attention to where his left hand is. I said pay NO attention. Hey, quit staring; I saw him first.)

5. I have almost no interest in sports whatsoever.

6. I played with Barbies and My Little Ponies as a child.

7. I dislike camping. It involves going without electricity and hot running water and locked doors for too long. Not to mention the bugs. And the greasy layer of sunscreen. And the dismalness of granola bars. Isn't this why we invented houses and major appliances in the first place?

8. I have a keen sense of smell. Sometimes eerily so.

9. I can name hundreds of colors, but can only identify about five makes of cars. (VW Beetle, Datsun Z-car, VW bus...uh...PT Cruiser...uh...)

10. I do own some lacy undergarments. And some lavender ones. (But nothing lacy and lavender at the same time.)

Current Music: Clannad - "Northern Skyline"

You. Yes, you. How and why did you select your username, if you don't mind sharing? (Ignore if patently obvious; e.g., "Uh, it's my actual name.")

I'll get the ball rolling.
LemonLye is the proper way to write my nick, but LJ doesn't allow capital letters. This was one of my first chat nicknames, chosen about six years ago when I was way, way into The Cure. Source: their song "The Caterpillar"; lyric: "Dust my lemon lies with powder pink and sweet..." I originally was LemonLie, but later tweaked the spelling, just to be cute. It has proved a handy username at lots of websites, since generally nobody has ever registered it before.

Isn't that fascinating? OK, your turn.

Current Mood: Pretty Xmas lights!
Current Music: Catecatecatecatecatecatepillar girl...

I am twenty-seven years old now. Sounds relatively ancient. But for all you young'uns who are wondering what it could possibly feel like to be so incredibly old, well, gather round and Grandma will tell you:

It feels exactly the same as 19, 20, 21...and so on. In fact I sometimes lose track, and think I'm still 25. It's no longer a series of great leaps uphill every time you have another birthday, the way it is when you're a teenager. It's a plateau now, and the next step up will probably not happen till 30. Then it's another plateau till 40. And on like that.

In a lot of ways I'm actually in better shape then I was at 19. I get more exercise, have stronger muscles, and have learned to cope with stress better. I feel much more in control of my life. (Probably because I AM more in control of my life.) I see the importance of laughing and of not taking myself so seriously. I get to avoid my family for long stretches at a time if I want to. I feel much smarter and have found that people treat me as an adult. (Sure, I've legally been an adult since 18, but I didn't really feel like I joined the ranks until announcing that I was engaged. Not sure why, but that's a topic for another day: "How does it feel to be married, Grandma?"...It feels fine, but that isn't today's subject.)

I have no new complaints about my looks yet. They haven't taken any unexpected twists, and I've learned over the years how to enhance them, so we're getting along all right for the time being, my looks and I. Other signs of aging? Well...I stare at the computer screen so long, and have done for so many years, that I'm starting to feel the eye strain. I don't doubt that reading glasses are in my future. That's okay. I figure they'll suit my bookish personality; make me look smarter; etc.

Also, I almost never used to get headaches, but now I do occasionally. Possibly related to the eye strain thing. On the brighter side, I don't get colds near as often as I did in college and high school. Greatly increased nutrition is probably helpful there--I have learned in the intervening years to eat vegetables.

I can now get away with things that used to look silly on the younger me: lipstick and long earrings, to name just two. (I did wear them as a teen, but I realize now that they made me look silly.)

Anyway. I'm just musing, and I'm done now, so I hope you didn't expect a tidy conclusion or anything.

In the interests of not taking things too seriously, here is the Pervy Out-of-Context Quote of the Day:
'All right, I'll tackle Strider by the camp-fire: he's less testy.' - Pippin, in 'The Two Towers'
Slashers, take it away!

Current Mood: ancient and sage-like

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mollyringle

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Page Summary

Meme of The Random
Locksmithery 101
Comedic cynicism in the home
Back in my prime
BNF issue
Saturn Return
The ebb and flow of my self-perception
O, Theatre and Teen Jealousie
Just for curiosity's sake
Oh, the meme.
What the hell is my problem?
A cautionary tale for ye young lovers, from the long-ago days of 1990
Liberté, Egalité, Androgyné
Seriously, dude, what does your username mean?
(no subject)

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Molly Ringle

You've read the book; now see the blog!

Entries tagged with self

Meme of The Random

Locksmithery 101

Comedic cynicism in the home

Back in my prime

BNF issue

Saturn Return

The ebb and flow of my self-perception

O, Theatre and Teen Jealousie

Just for curiosity's sake

Oh, the meme.

What the hell is my problem?

A cautionary tale for ye young lovers, from the long-ago days of 1990

Liberté, Egalité, Androgyné

Seriously, dude, what does your username mean?

(no subject)