Throbbing manroots and other botanical oddities

[mollyringle]

I've just finished proofing the (electronic) galleys for The Ghost Downstairs (yes, I'll tell you once I have my release dates), so it's time for some lightweight material. What better for the occasion than this long, but hilarious, thread on the phrases in romance novels that drive readers crazy?

Considering it goes on for 700 comments and still running, I haven't read them all. But some of my favorites are:

"man-root"
"burning sword of his manhood"
a character having violet eyes (A peeve of mine for sure. I have never seen anyone with violet eyes.)
bodies turning to "molten lava" during sex
"laving" of nipples
"going blind" during sex (one reader writes, "all I can do is hope she isn't actually suffering a retinal detachment")
"releasing his boiling tribute into her"

Yikes. I better stop there before this post becomes unsuitable for minors.

Comments

[kali-kali.livejournal.com]

Ye gods, I've read some dreadful fanfiction in my time (in fact, quite a lot of it in the past two days, as it seems good NCIS fic is hard to find), and a lot of it uses such metaphors, but the boiling tribute really does take the cake. Yowch.

[mollyringle.livejournal.com]

And to think, it got past all those editors. Someone must actually dig this stuff.